Angry Angry Angry

Finally I had scolded the ger who used my dit pic for her siggy... I had tried to calm myself down for the past few days but it still explode when I saw her way of replying other ppl's request in her thread. I dun like her attitude so I decided to tell her off.

After playing my sin for sometimes, I feel boring wif her as I feel her life in maple will b oni L7 and nth else. So i created a dit on xmas eve and my dear helped to lvl her till 10 since she had trouble killing orange mush in lower lvl.

During xmas day i was browsing the forum and saw a siggy making thread, I submitted 3 pics taken in cs asking her to help me designed. Tat's whr my nightmare came.. She got herself a new siggy by using all my pics as her own without even bother to ask me. I kept quiet when i saw tat, tinking she might tell me later on. I waited for days but she nv mention anything so I assume she is not going to say anything abt it.

Seriously speaking, I wasnt angry that she do not hav time to do the siggys in the thread as there were alot of them but I was angry of her using my pics. Her supporters oni noe how to flame blindly saying she can took the pics herself, using char stimulator blah blah blah when evidences r being thrown rite in front of their faces.

Haha~ Rite now i m just enjoying myself flaming them back too since maple is still down... Who wanna join me? =D

YaYa

My Fears...

Recently some incidents which I chose to forgotten has been coming back to me and thus bringing back the fear as well. It was quite long ago, during my secondary time and I had never told anyone abt it, not even my dear since I had chose not to rmb it. However, the fear came back...

It had been so mani years since I last saw him.. He didnt change much except grown fatter. The incidents keep appearing in my mind, making me so frighten. Till now, I do not dare to look at him directly.

Why must he show up? Why cant he let me bury those nightmares and never get it out again? I do not know wad to do, my mind is in a mess...

YaYa

Weird Happenings

I duno I took how long to fall aslp coz of the thunder.. Go laugh at me, I admit I m afraid of thunder and mani other stuffs tooIt has been raining since yst, on and off. It made the surrounding so cold and dark like late evening. I wonder when is it going to stop, I wan my sun back. T_T

Haiz.. I had finish watching all the episodes available in youtube for naruto, now I nid to wait weekly for new episode to b out so decide to watch bleach while waiting. =) Bleach is quite a funny anime too but kinda of more scary too, the monsters I'm talking abt.

Last nite rite after I switch off my pc, sometink caught my attention. A yellow butterfly flying around me, I was surprised (very) by it. I never expect a butterfly could actually flew into 7th floor HDB flat in the middle of the night. It landed awhile on the floor but less tan 5 secs, it flew up and it was gone suddenly. I tried in vain searching for it but gave up after 5mins...

Was lying on my bed tossing ard since I cant slp, I heard someone open the main gate n door. However, there was no closing sound nor footstep after tat. I m very sure tat the sound of opening if from the outside coz main gate come first. I look out of the window and scanned ard my neighbours' hse, there isn't anyone. Yah, at this point of time my mind ran wild, I got up and quicky shut my door b4 covering myself wif blanket. >.<

Pls dun let such incident happen to me again, it was so scary...

YaYa.

Bringing My Death Forward

Have not been feeling well for the past few days but yet I refused to rest more, pushing myself to my limit. I noe by doing tis, I m making myself more vulnerable to illness & death. But who care?

No matter how tired I get, I just kip dragging myself on coz I noe even Iying on bed wont fall asleep. My mind doesnt allow me to rest anyway. =) Lucky I got naruto to accompany me thru those nites or else I do not noe wad to do alone. Yah, I got no frens.. Even I hav, they r oni those hi and bye frens. I hardly talked wif anyone, they will oni talked to me when they nid some answers and perhaps guess I will noe it bah.

I'm getting used of doing tinks alone again. I no longer feel I nid anyone or I m needed by anyone.. Even though I m smiling, my heart is not doing the same. I do not noe since when I had build back my wall n this time I even add a lock on it too, refusing to let myself to open up again. I guess this might a better solution to me and to everyone. :-)

Dying YaYa

Stupid Naruto

Yawn~ Last nite I slept at 4am. Wanted to slp earlier de, my finger just couldnt stop clicking the naruto one episode after another. It was so exciting battle & by watching halfway will just made me unable to fall in slp more.

Stupid Naruto show... Made me cried last nite while watching. Lucky everyone is aslp ler so no1 seen me. ;p Haku is so kind-hearted till he actually sacrified himself for his master even he knew from the beginning he was oni a tool. It was so touching!!! Dun u dare to laugh at me, go watch yourself, I bet u will cry as well if u use your heart to view it. The loading is soooooooooooooooooo slow ar till to a point it just kip die on me. FASTER PLS!!! I refresh it 3 times liao, wad u wan me to do?!

Haha... Caiyong fall sick again. -_- Well, he brought it upon himself de. Who ask him kip refusing to drink more water and eat so much heaty food. Now complaint of somach pain liao, as usual. Didn bother so much as I noe he will b well again tml when he wake up. ;p

Finally dear is back home 2dae but as I expected, he still hasnt got time for me. He actually forgotten tml he got test/exam!!!! (That idiot~ -_-) I refused to allow him to reply to our thread as I want him to concentrate on his studies but I noe it very well de. Even he nv reply it, he will still viewing it every now & then. Am I correct, my dear? F3

I wonder if he missed me tis few days or not... Hmm... Just to let u noe I DUN miss u!!!

YaYa

Insane Watching Anime

Yawn~ I m so tired... Not tired from mapling but sometink new tis time. ;p Guess it...



Got the ans yet? Hee~




Is Anime, Naruto! Haha~ It was so funny n I couldnt stop watching to go slp. -_-


2dae is my 1st day n viewing episode 14 n still counting... I m glad that weiwei intro tis anime to me, i luv u weiwei!!! Muacks~

Haiz, I was so addicted to it till I dun really bother abt my siggy contest in forum. Bleah~ Nid sometimes to let tis anime addiction to cool off de, just like maple. ;p I noe dear wont get too angry wif me de. Rite hor dear? =D

I no time to write liao, show starting ler, cya~

YaYa

Sick Day

Yst I was too tired n didnt play dear's char, tink oni up 1-2% oni. I was tinking of training him on sat afternoon de but haiz, in the end I was slping instead of in maple. My head was in pain, I couldn get myself to face the pc so I hav no choice but to log out maple. Sry dear, sry for not training. However, I still manage to lvl him up during 2x exp timing. Hee~

2dae I broke record, I didn eat lunch or dinner. That include breakfast hor... Duno y... Just cant eat at all, I kip feeling very full n looking at the rice already me wan to puke liao. -_-ll As usual, I threw away the food secretly. I noe is a sin to throw away but how m I supposed to eat it when I hav no appetite?

I miss him alot, how i wish he is wif me now.. *Sob sob* But I noe he's bz working, cannot disturb him.. I feel like calling him and cry my heart out. I always cry whenever I fall sick de coz I hate that feeling of uncomfortable. But at the same time, I oso hate to eat medicines too. So I can oni wait for my immune system to heal me. T.T

Now watching Jackie Wu's show, so funny sia... Make me forget my sickness for time being. =) Yeah, I tink dear already off work ler. Haha~ He must b having his supper now. He's a piggy lai de, eat alot. Totally opposite of me... Hahaha, I oni good at eating chocolates n biscuits. But too bad he always dun allow me to eat de, he baddie. >.< I go watch my show ler, mayb ltr will go lvl my hoghog.

YaYa

New Blog Design

Was kinda of bored so decide to change new blog design. I had tis saved in my pc wif the previous design at the same time but I didnt use tis as I like the animals in that previous design. Took me quite some time to get wad I wan in tis design. Not I stupid ok? I was trying ard wif pics, testing which look the best in it. Finally I made my decision to use these (it was hard to make decision as I love all my pics, haha). Is tis nicer or the previous better? o.O

As usual, I changed my mind again... >.< A fren of mine told me why do u nid to worry so much now? He advise me to hold on till he come sg. He felt mayb is b coz we r being far away, tat's y I feel insecure & lack of confidence. I really had no idea if I can wait till he come or just give up again... But I noe even he noe he's going to get hurt by me again, he is willing to do so too. Sry dear..

I had been training hard for our chars in maple as each day I see them getting nearer to 3rd job, it makes me feel so happy. Not that I had not been to 3rd job b4, is b coz tis time I reaching tgt wif him instead of being alone again. =) Some ppl in maple r just so funny... I rmb yst when I was training my dear's char, I saw a sin cc into the chn & I tink he saw me too since I was just on his right side when he jumped dwn. As I dun mind sharing, I didnt speak a word... After I walked back from the right, he said, " cc pls, ty." I replied, " I just saw u jump dwn from the top LOL." After saying tat, he disappear... I tink he went other chn ler bah, didn bother at all. I wonder is he trying to b a joker or tinking I'm blind?

When is the stupid invalid pointer caused by tv going to get solved? I really hate it whenever I get pass the tv & get my whole maple to shut dwn. It's so irritiating!!! I dun even understand y do they hav the tv in the 1st place. It was so exp to use it n hardly we see anyone using it anyway. Like some of the forumers said, the tv is white elephant. Haha~

That idiot again giving excuses when I ask him when his so-called $ going to xfer to me. It was the 3rd week liao & he still claiming that the bank had not given an answer yet. Which bank took sooooo long to give an answer?! They can't b happier when u r loaning from them! I guess he really tink I m a 3 year old kid. I had already found out mani loopholes in the conversations wif him but I keeping quiet now. I will spill out everything when the time is ripe. Now is still not the time yet. ;p

I wonder how's dear work. Issit crowded wif ppl, issit bz or issit bored? I nv sms him as I do not wan to disturb him during his work time. =( So boring, tink I will go change my tagboard colour as I feel it doesnt suit my blog colour. Hehe..

YaYa

No Title

I hardly slp last nite, too much tinks on my mind. Eventually I fall sick liao, now headache n flu... How I wish sickness can just let one to die so I do not nid to b so trouble ler.

Once again I told him that treat me as fren oni, I feel so weird when we arent even tgt n yet he pretending nth happened. Yah, we broke off more tan 2mths ago. I just feel we r not suited for each other.. He is still so young, has a bright future ahead of him and he stayed msia. Me? I m old ler, no future and stay in sg. There r mani facts lying there, I just cant pretend they r not there or tinking they will disappear when time comes. Sooner or later I will nid to face it..

It mayb very hurt now but time will numb us, soon we will no longer feel anything towards tis relationship. I rather he blames me now for being so selfish than he regret being wif me in future. =)

I want to delete my chars in maple but I just cant bear to do it. I noe by deleting it will further confirm our situation. I duno why I cant click the confirmation icon of deleting... Perhaps I still nid some time to persuade myself to press it.. I noe I will regret it once I delete it but I noe that's a must.

He's going to JB to work 2dae, I wish him luck. And nxt mth he will having exams, I noe he will do well in his coming exams. I trust he will do everything for his future n himself de.

Hope the rain stop soon, I want to change my number. >.<

YaYa

Meaningful Phrase

I saw tis somewhere, find it very meaningful so I decided to kip it here for memories. =)

cause my heart wont be your ragdoll anymore

there's a moment in my mind i've scribbled & erase a thousand times

smile, its easier then explaining why you are sad

you're the last thing my heart expected, Love

before you found me, you already abandoned me

& once i thought waitting could change something

a woman's heart is a deep ocean of secrets

& yet those promises had been emptied by time

in your sweet embrace, all my pain's erased

& i cant live in the past & drown myself in memories

& your name is the secret word to the doors of hearts

Goodbye to you, to everything i thought i knew

should i trust this postage due, to deliver my heart to you

a year ago you saw my first tear, and it was for you

that romance, it shows how much i tried to love you

Too true to say goodbye to you

& i dont know tomorrow
we can still love each other as much as we do now.

I forgot to get you a gift, so i decided to BE the gift.

Since love won't last forever, let's enjoy what we have before a meteor decides to kill us.

The courage in the depths of the chest that slashes apart the darkness;
The white wings that severs confusion,
"I don't think that I can do everything by myself anymore!"

Since Light travels Faster than sound, people appear bright. until we hear them speak



Maple has been so laggy till I hardly wan to go in. I can oni train till 10am n the rest of the day shld b facing lags & dcing. Tis is so sux... I really dun understand wad's the problem here. It's like getting from bad to worse! Oh well, at least I get to slp early n maple early in the morning. =)

I m so tired now, wan to go zzz ler. Hope I wont hav nightmares again, like last nite. >.<

YaYa

Boring Weekend~

Haiz... He wont b home till Monday as he's going Penang straight after school for work. T.T No one accompany me to maple n chit chat le.. U know if one dun talk for whole day, u will hav bad breath de. *sob sob*

Delphinus is out 2dae, no excitement or feeling. I really had no idea wad wizet r tinking. R they too rich, no other place to spend their $? Bootes and Cass barely full, I can hardly find someone in Cass. They tink by opening a new world, it will as filled as Aquila? It will b as dead as the other 2 worlds, zzz. I rather they spend the $ solving the lags n bugs. At least it will make people more willing to continue the game instead of all quitting.

I will definitely not moving to new world as I used so mani mths to train my char to lvl58, I m not going to give her up now. I dun hav the energy I used to hav to train her to 3rd job in 2 mths like I used to do so. By repeating such process, it will make maple boring. Not to mention I had spend so much cash on her, and turning her to my fav look. =D Anyway I jolly well know those who move over only have one motive; to b the top player in that world. Lame~

Hopefully Showa VIP Hair cut coupon will b out 2dae, I m looking forward for tat. Intending to create another siggy competition wif at least 20k-30k A-cash as prize(s). Havent decide how much yet and 1 or 2 winners, I m still deciding. Hmm... Any idea? Most probably I will send it as gift rather tan giving the code to the winner just in case he/she telling me code is wrong. I will take every successful gift's ss and kip it in my pc as evidence. Haha~

Going Jurong Point later, might b looking for present n xmas card since maple wont b up so soon. If u see me there, rmb to say hi to me k? =)

YaYa

Free, Free, Free

Yeah, I feel so happy now. Tis morning I went to the lawyer and finally got him sign the papers. Haha... Now he cannot disagree anything liao, he was the one who signed it in front of the commissioner. *Dancing around*

Jackie told me the hearing date is on 26th Dec next month and if everything goes smoothly, I can get my divorce papers at April. Hehe... I guess that is my best bdae present all my life, at least for now. =)

Was so tired when I got home so decided to went for nap wif my little princess for awhile. She noisy leh, woke me up a couple of times. In the end she woke up later than me. Haha..

Went taka shopping but didnt manage to get wad I wan. Wad to do? Xmas is coming yet I havent get him a present. Hmm.. Anyone has any suggestion of wad to get? All suggestions will b put under consideration. ^^

Enen got herself a new water bottle, so cute de coz I oso like that design but of coz I wont use it. Too childish.. -_- I oso bought her a new bag but it was a pity the colour I want is already sold. Haiz.. Should had bought it last mth when I saw it, now regret oso no use. She chose a light pink colour instead, oh well, she is the one using it not me. =D Dun tink she oni get those, she bought her favourite, winx club fairy. She been bugging me for weeks. I consider that as xmas present cum bdae present. Haha.. I sound like a baddie hor? As for Joel, I bought him a Power Ranger toy. Feel the nid to buy him one as enen got a toy or else I look so unfair sia.

Due to my laziness, I didnt bring umbrella out and been walking in the rain for quite a while. Hopefully I wont fall sick b coz of tis or else I will definitely getting tons of nagging from u noe who. =(

Someone rushing me to maple liao, gogogo. Hope to get her to 3rd job by nxt mth!

YaYa

After A Long Rest

It has been weeks since I last visited my own blog. Previously I had no wish to come back to view this sad place wif all those sad memories.After of calming myself for sometimes, I feel better now.

I was wondering, perhaps I had depression but I dun wan to find out or even to get myself cure. I must be mad... Who cares abt it? =D

Finally going to get my divorce done, meeting the lawyer for the 3rd time and of coz paying $500 again... T.T But well, at least I will be free after paying her the 4th time! I really looking forward for that day to come, I dun wan to hav anymore to do wif that idiot. Just my luck to meet such a jerk.

Has been raining these few days, making everyone falling sick. I tink I will get the sickness sooner or later since the kids ard me are already starting their germs to me. -_-ll Must drink more water and rest more.. Urgh... I hate the feeling of falling sick and most impt tink is I HATE MEDICINES.

Been slacking alot in maple.. Duno why, always wan to slp when I start to maple esp in gangster town. Haha.. Sometimes I just hang myself there and leech while I went to watch tv. Gangster town just dun attract me... >.<

Oops.. I forgot to get diamonds for tomato ler. Hahaha.. Later he will b chasing me for it, tink I promised to get 30 for him few days ago. Better go maple and shop ard now in case I forget again tml morning. ;p

Love YaYa

My Last Words

Tis is my very last time writing here, wif my true feeling. I noe I wont hav any chance again coz I will not give myself a 2nd chance.

Since young, I already knew being a human is a torture. I always ask why am I being brought to this world and suffer? Mani times adults think that by providing us gd education and life of everything is being responsible. But did they realise how mani times I was being humiliated in school and how nasty they said abt me and my family? Perhaps they will never get to know as I never mentioned a word to them. There r mani tinks cant b bought by money, like care and concern. I always tink: why dun i get a complete family like my frens do? why dun i get to see my parents daily like my frens do? why dun i get family day like my frens do? No1 gave me the answer before, I dun even dare to ask the adults for fear I will get scoldings and beatings instead.

I dun like people, I dun like to talk wif them. I dun wan anyone of them to get close me and hurt me. But still I failed to protect myself..

Just now I said very hurtful comments to someone I cared and loved most. I know he must have hated me alot now. He told me he hate me, very very much and had never loved me all along. I really hoped he said that from his bottom of his heart. I'm glad he said that to me, so tat I can leave this world in peace knowing this.

I am so tired of living on, I can't find any reason for me to continue on. Everyone hates me, I am just a burden to everyone. If I were to leave tis world, it's a release for all. It will bring everyone happiness... If my death can do such great thing, death is nothing to me.

Sorry tat I bring so much sorrow, unhappiness and troubles to people ard me. I hope tat life without me will be a better life for all of you. I love you.

Love YaYa

Lies, Lies & Lies

After more tan 7mths, I finally realised that I had never been in love. All those love & promises are nothing but lies only... Stupid arh?

I should have known that right from the start but everytime I had been so naive. No one is true to anyone.. They pretend it for sometink in return. Only if you r of some use or else u r just a pile of rubbish...

Issit so fun to make fun of me and my feeling? Isn't I am a human being as well? Why some people can do it without their conscious?  I am just plain stupid, thinking everyone will use their true feeling to treat me but in the end everyone just hurt me.

It's time for me to wake up from my dreams and face the reality. I shall treat it as a lesson learnt but this lesson had been too much for me to take it. Perhaps I am right to choose to abort my baby.. But this nightmare will only follow me alone for the rest of my life.

Stupid YaYa

I hardly slept last nite, tink I oni slept 2-3hrs. My mind was blank, I just couldn't fall asleep.. Mayb tis situation will last quite some time, mayb it will follow me forever...

I heard him cried mani times on phone, I wanted to tell him so much not to cry, it's heartpain for me to hear him behaving tis way but.. I noe I cannot cry in front of him, I noe it will make him feel worse.

"Why does the sun go on shinning? Why does my heart go on beating? Dun they noe it's the end of the world, it ended when he say goodbye." A song I learnt frm my sec school, I loved tis song though I cant rmb the lyrics anymore. Suit me arh?

My heart feel so pain, I duno y.. I wanted to stay by his side so much but I noe it's not possible. I can't be so selfish, oni tink of my own happiness n forsake their future. How I wish there is miracle, how I wish someone will tell me a solution.. How I wish..

YaYa

The Truth

It's raining very heavily outside, just like my heart. I had broke up wif him...

I am tired, really tired.. No matter how much I love him, I rather choose to give up tis relationship than carry on. I remember a quote from a blogskin I saw last week or so; "In love and lonely". It's like I'm in a relationship wif someone and yet I felt alone at all times.

Many times I really dun understand why am I the only one doing everything; am I the only one in this relationship? My heart can no longer takes it, my tears are beyond my control.

He told me there is no way I can stay in msia, he mentioned tons of reasons which my heart already can't hear it. He's correct; we can't be together at all. There is no future between us; only dreams. I'm a singaporean while he's a msian.. Even he came sg, he will nid to go back to his country one day. Wad do I do then? I don't know, take it as dream or blame myself for being naive? I dun wan to wait for tat day to come...

From the start,I should have realised it but being in love have blind me.

I should have just kept my heart closed, I shouldn't allow another person to get into my life and hurt me again. No one can be trusted, I will never ever allow another person to get close to me. This is more than enough for me to bear..

YaYa

Busy Day

Tis morning woke up ard 8.15am to bring Joel to primary school for a reading evaluation, not mani people there. Feel so weird there, like a totally stranger and I m not sure how should I behave or react. Guess I nid to learn it asap.. >.<

Haze was bad when I went out, everything look so "white". Just as I expected, the PSI till 10am was more tan 100.. When can I hav my fresh air back??? T.T
I feel I m falling sick soon as I started to feel a little sore throad despite of drinking lots of water. *Trying to point my finger at the horrible haze and cursing it to make me falling sick.*

My hands itchy, went to create a "Quitting Aquila Sales"... Made myself and my dear so busy for the whole day.. I was tinking there is no point keeping all the meso & items in aquila anymore since I had never even touch them for 6 months. I know it will take sometime but I didn't expect it to take whole afternoon & nite! Now then I realise I got so much items that require more tan 6 chars to filled up. -_-ll

I missed my hedgehog... Tink will spend my weekend on her to make up the time I neglected her. Got to attend to my thread again.. Free me from hell soon..

YaYa

I m Useless, but i decided to protect u..

Jz now, i said something vr hurtful to my dear. I dunno why i said that, but i really didnt mean it. Coz i too useless? I feel i cannot protect my dear, cannot give her a good future compare to others. My dear has vr bad past. i dun wan she being hurt again, i wan her to live in happiness n smile everyday. Me as a student, even after graduate, i also jz a fresh graduate, will I be able to let my dear live happily? Since long ago I had been thinking about this question.. until yesterday, my dear told me something, she is tired to settle things alone, she wan marry someone that will do everything for her. At that moment, my mind stop thinking coz i am sad and hurt. Coz i worry i cannot give my dear all tis....

Coz i love my dear, i want to let her happy. 1 person sad is always better than 2 people sad, this stupid idea suddenly came out from my mind n i told my dear..
Until now, i stil not able to sleep... i keep worrying my dear, keep missing my dear.

Dear, i got something to tel u..

Dear, i wrong le.. pls forgive me hao ma.? Pls give me 1 more chance, hao ma.? I will study hard n work hard, i m no longer worry about future le. Because,
I m useless, but i will try my best, to protect u, to give u a good family...


hoping dear back to me de chongyu

Should I or Should I Not?

Since yesterday, he has been asking me to return to his side. I feel very confused, to agree or not to agree? I admit I am a easily persuade person so everytime I had to avoid face-to-face conversation. This is to prevent myself from being soft-hearted..

What should I do? I been asking myself this question countless times but yet I couldn't get an answer at all. Why? Is the answer so hard to be figure out?

Sometimes I really envy the kids, they had no problems to think of. Everyday they are laughing and smiling, if only I can do the same.

Will I be able to sleep tonight? I don't know... Perhaps I nid to figure out wad I wan before I can have a good night's sleep. >.<

Finally I realised that "uncle" is from malaysia, all along I thought he was singaporean. But now thinking back, it might be my careless for not noticing it. But I dun really care where he is from as long as my mum is happy. Wish all the best to them!

YaYa

The Reality

I cried again last nite... I chose to give up the plan dear told me 2 days ago.. Perhaps I should solve my problem myself, and not dragging someone else in as well.

I was over the moon when dear had suggested it but I noe it was very selfish of me to do so. And also, I do not want to tied him wif a piece of paper. He's still young, he may meet someone who is more suitable for him but if he had married me to help me stay in msia, he will be tied by the marriage certifcate. More ever, he still nid to settle his debts.. Wif us ard, it will b much more harder for him as we will become his burden. I can't do that, I can't... My heart don't allow me to do it..

Dreams shall always remain as dreams.. Bringing it to reality will only hurt people.. No matter how hard it is, I will still get over. I hope u too... =)

YaYa

Yesterday, my dear being scold by her mum again. I know dear is sad n scare yesterday, I really hope that I can run to sg n hug her, protect her. So I was waiting, waiting for the time when dear is coming msia...
Again n again, i not sleep well yesterday. my project is going to pass up and testing on tis saturday. I stil rushing for it. Luckily, my dear is always with me, she always support me...
We have planned yesterday we will stay at KL after i graduate. I m waiting, waiting for me to pass this project, and finish my study... then, i can stay wif dear le..

Chongyu

Life Of Sadness

Haiz... Got scolding from my mum just b4 i slpt last nite. Wonder wad tiggered her anger? Perhaps is b coz Joel refused to sleep and been playing ard. -_-

Sometimes I was tinking, if she wan to say something, why can't she said it to me as normal instead of shouting and scolding? Is it by doing this method, the msg will get thru better? Or perhaps she is just venting her anger like my dear said? He said people who worked at the stove are more bad-tempered b coz of the heat. When they can't tolerated it, they will nid to vent out the anger. Mayb he was rite, mayb...

I dun wan to tink so much, the feeling is not good when u r being reminded of it. I wanted to run away as far as i can, I hated those feeling. Those feeling make one so miserable, is like u r a burden to this world. I guess my mum hates me, even by not talking, I will still get scoldings.

Dear had suggested to me that he working in KL instead of sg after he graduate since I dun wan to stay here. He wan me to b happy, he dun wan to see me sad. Then all of us shall moving to KL as well...

I trust him.. I trust him that he would fulfill his promises to me, I trust that he won't lie to me. Dear, I love you..

YaYa

Results Day

Finally my siggy/userbar contest ended, it was so hard to make a decision. I am so blur, almost forgot to choose the winners. Lucky dear remembered, and did most of the decisions for me. He even reminded me to submit results when I had totally forgotten abt it. Thks dear, u r the best! =)

One of the winners is so anxious to get the prizes, keep leaving msgs in my thread. She gave me a feeling as if I am going to cheat her. Nowadays is hard to guess people's thoughts. =(

Haze is still remain as bad, PSI more tan 100 for the day. Just now on my way home, I heard from the news there r still more tan 100 hotspots in Sumatra. OMG... -_-

Dear dear 2dae hardly tok to me, he was busy rushing his project. *sob sob*

I'm glad that I had something on hand to keep me busy as well, that is to do our blog. It took me 2 days to figure out how to do amendments and edit in the designed template. I am such a slow poke.. x(

Yeah, finally dear is free to accompany me. We are going maple liao... =D

YaYa

My Nightmare Again~~

Recently, my nightmare came again. I faced this nightmare before, 1 year ago. Now , it came to me again, Final Year Project. Dear, during coding time, i may not have much time to accompany you, i have to rush for it, for me, for u, and for us. I know this will make u feel lonely, feel sian. But so am i, i also very miss u when i m doing my project, i wish to accom u, wish to maple with you. Anyway, i just want to tell u, you are alway inside my heart, I Miss You, I Love You... Muacks..

Chongyu

Living Hell

2dae I was caught by surprise when I went out to buy bread. Y the haze is gettin frm bad to worse de?! PSI till 7pm was 128... When can I see clearer sg and breathe in fresher air? Surrounding here looked very alike in Genting except for the air and smell. x(

So stressed now, stupid me went to create a contest thread and nw unable to decide which 1 to win. There r so mani siggys and userbars I like, I just can't make up my mind. -_-
Which one should i choose? Follow my heart, let my heart decide for me.

SO sad.. I got neglected...Mei ren yao wo le, zhen ke lian. *Sob sob*

Haiz, tink my hedgehog is the best ler. She is always there for me, whether rain or shine; day or nite.

sad sad de YaYa

My First Time..

Haha...

This is my first time using blog, still not a bad experience. I tink i must b outdated ler, dun even noe such a popular site. =(

2dae had been in daze, i had no idea how i spent my day. Perhaps crying since I had quarrel wif my laogong last nite. He was so fierce, keeping shouting at me and made me cry. *baddie* He scared me quite a few times actually, making me dun dare to talk wif him. Dun u dare to shout so loud at me again, u r scaring me!! =((

And hor, dear, dun hurt urself again. How's ur hands now? R they still pain? Serve u rite for hitting the wall..

Sian ar, 3 days passed and i havent level my char yet.. :~( When will i get to level 50? Laogong, u must help me hor! =p

So tired... Last nite nv slp well, now wan go zzz ler. Sweet dreams laogong and lastly, MUACKS!!!

YaYa